Thursday 30 December 2010

That Time of Year Again...

As we're approaching the end of 2010, it's time for the obligatory end of year lists. So here are my top 10 albums of 2010:

1. The Dead Weather - Sea of Cowards
2. Local Natives - Gorilla Manor
3. Menomena - Mines
4. Aloe Blacc - Good Things
5. Beach House - Teen Dream
6. Sleigh Bells - Treats
7. Standard Fare - The Noyelle Beat
8. Kings Go Forth - The Outsiders Are Back
9. These New Puritans - Hidden
10. Gonjasufi - A Sufi and a Killer

Sadly Gonjasufi is not on Spotify, so if you're curious you might just have to buy that one. As a further treat for you, here's my Best of 2010 playlist.

Happy New Year!


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Now playing: The Fresh & Onlys - I'm A Thief
via FoxyTunes

Monday 4 October 2010

Tales of the Un...Employed

It's now been four weeks since I finished my Masters, and I am still unemployed. So how have I been filling my days I hear you cry? Well, first and foremost I have been applying for jobs, obviously. Frustratingly this is not a process I am particularly fond of, primarily because nowhere these days seems to accept a CV, instead insisting that you fill out an online application form. Fair enough I suppose, I assume this ensures all of their applications are uniform. However, for us poor suckers who want to apply for more than one job a day, it is soul destroying. Filling out all of your work experience and qualifications in slightly different formats is incredibly tedious, and then writing what is basically a small essay for each job on why you want the position is remarkably time consuming. I swear that this affects my chances, because I'm so bored by the second application that I end up copying and pasting a lot of information without really thinking it through. Unsurprisingly I'm yet to hear back about any interviews.

My alternative to job hunting is to either do a PhD, the idea of which I'm warming to more and more, or to do a more practical course that will supply me with all the essential practical skills needed to work in the environmental sector. This second option is less likely at the minute because most of these courses cost, and are not in Birmingham, so I need money for accommodation and such. Whose bright idea was money?!

Elsewhere, I've been re-immersing myself in the world of music, starting up both As Well Continue To Run and Couthe again, much to my delight. The former had a very successful gig in Hinckley on Friday which seemed to go down well with both the crowd and the management, as we've been invited to play three more dates at Praha in the next few months. I've also signed up for the Birmingham half marathon, a decision I'm regretting slightly having realised I only have three weeks left to train. In fact I better start warming up for tonight's run...


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Now playing: Why? - The Vowels Pt. 2
via FoxyTunes

Friday 27 August 2010

My Life as a Guinea Pig

I'm currently balls deep in writing up my Cornwall project, whilst also trying to get any cash I can together to make rent and generally live. My first, quite successful plan, was selling some of my possessions on ebay. I always said I wouldn't sell anything, but needs must and I'm only selling things which I've either never used, or are simply collecting dust in my admittedly dusty room. My other means of income currently is whoring myself out to medical research.

Okay, I'm not technically prostituting myself, nor am I involved in any medical research as such. I have signed up to help out at the School of Psychology at the University of Birmingham with a study that is apparently to do with eyesight. I personally believe it is more to do with how the brain perceives certain images, but no one's telling me anything. So for the last couple of days I've been sitting in a dark room staring at a computer screen which is intermittently flashing a series of dots up on the screen. I then have to press buttons to say whether I think the dots look like a hexagon with its point at the top or on the side. This continues for two hours. I can say in all seriousness that this is one of the dullest things I've ever done. Jesus, I'd even consider getting a job rather than this! Thankfully no one is watching me, and so I've taken to listening to my iPod whilst laboriously pressing "1" or "0" for two hours straight. I'm not sure if this affects the results, but iof no one can be bothered to monitor me I'm just going to keep doing it. By then end I have the appearance of a man who has been awake for three days doing nothing other than smoking marijuana and rubbing his eyes. I'm fairly sure it's not good for the brain to be sat in a room with flashing lights for that amount of time, in fact I'm sure of it as yesterday I was sick in my mouth a little during the "experiment". Maybe that's the point...

I shouldn't complain though, I'm getting paid for it and next week I'll be subjected to an fMRI scan as part of the research. I just hope the study provides some fascinating results. It is paying for me to go to the last weekend of the Edinburgh Festival this weekend with Sam though, so it's all worth it.

Tuesday 17 August 2010

One Big Mac and a McCurry Please

Just a very quick one, here's that Steve McCurry photograph I spoke about in my previous blog. I popped back into the gallery to find out what it was called, so enjoy!
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Now playing: Phoenix - Lasso
via FoxyTunes

Monday 16 August 2010

46 Cakes

All is well with the world at the minute. I finally figured out where I was going wrong with my Cornwall data and so my maps are actually looking like they should, or at least will be once I've converted around 800 co-ordinates into the correct format. I've had a great weekend this weekend darting about for Sam's birthday (happy birthday Sam!). She had some friends down from Scotland, and from London, and some more local friends, all of whom congregated at the Yardbird last night for many drinks and eventually wine and cake back at hers. Good times.

Today we went along to see the Steve McCurry exhibit currently on display at the Waterhall Gallery in Birmingham. I was unaware of his work, apart from one very famous picture, but Sam and my brother had been harping on about it for a while so it was nice to finally see what all the fuss was about. I was very impressed I must say, some of the photographs captured the emotion of the subject flawlessly. I wasn't as keen on some of the blatantly set up scenarios, but his use of colour and subject matter is always exquisite. Here are a few of my favourites of those on display.
That first one may be my favourite photograph ever, although it's very hard to look at. There was another picture that looked like an oil painting but was in fact a monastery built into a cliff face, but I can't find it anywhere! If I do though, I'll be sure to post it...

Tuesday 10 August 2010

Was I Really In Poland?

Okay so I'm back in Birmingham now but thought I'd continue the blog anyway for the time being, seeing as it's acting as a fantastic procrastination device.

After deciding sorting out my entire room was a valuable use of my time yesterday, I cracked on with some actual work today. First and foremost, I wanted to see if the numerous co-ordinates I had spent the last 9 weeks collecting actually amounted to anything. Unfortunately, this has meant me teaching myself how to use DIVA-GIS, a free online geographic mapping tool. I've realised I am incredibly lazy when attempting to read tutorials, choosing to simply scan for key words as opposed to reading the whole thing. This meant I got nothing done for a good hour, and my first attempt ended up with all my co-ordinates appearing at various places around mainland Europe. Thankfully, I was being a moron, and had in fact mixed up my longitudes and latitudes. Half an hour of cutting and pasting later...the maps still don't look right. This could mean one of two things. Firstly, my co-ordinates are all off, and I've just needlessly subjected myself to 9 weeks in a damp caravan, or the more hopeful second option, the software I'm using is a bit crap because it's free. So tomorrow I'll begrudgingly pay the train fare and head into uni to use the posh mapping software.

I'm also applying for jobs at the minute, which I hate doing. I'm only looking for money currently and not a career job, just whilst I finish the course. I'm so lazy when it comes to this though, and most applications end up with me cutting and pasting my somewhat lacklustre CV onto various forms in the hope that the sheer quantity of jobs I apply for means one of them has to give me a go. We'll see...

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Now playing: Cymbals Eat Guitars – Like Blood Does
via FoxyTunes

Thursday 5 August 2010

The End of This Crazy Trip...

Today marks the final day of my stint down here in Cornwall; as we speak my dad is heading south to pick me up. I'll actually be leaving tomorrow as travelling from the midlands to Cornwall and back again in a day involves about thirteen hours of driving, and so I'll be sharing my final night in the caravan with my pa.

Yesterday I decided to have a final walk along the coast to take it all in before I leave. I chose to set off late, but on my way back received a phone call from Claire seeing if I still wanted to go over to hers that night. I felt bad because I had remembered making this arrangement but assumed she's forgotten so took my time spectacularly on my stroll. Anyway, I was still back in time to take her up on her offer, and we ended up having a barbecue on the beach, joined by her partner Ben. I must say I'm glad I went along as I finally got to see the sun setting over the sea, but unfortunately I have packed my camera so won't be able to post any pictures. I also enjoyed the best burger I've ever had, no cheese, a tiny bit of salad, but the tastiest burger of my life. I felt like Samuel L. Jackson in Pulp Fiction... I was also treated to a hot shower and a real bed, all in all a fine way to spend my penultimate night.

This morning I was greeted by Jeremy, the owner of the caravan, who informed me that word of my project had been spreading around the company, and in fact to the local press. This has concerned me somewhat, as I'm beginning to worry that the project might not be up to scratch. This is not technically my fault, the blame lies partly in the hands of time. If I can contextualise my work into the grander scope of food security and the importance of crop wild relatives however, then hopefully it will have all been worth it. I may have my work cut out for me when I get back, but I have around a month to write up which should be more than enough time to create a project which can be referenced by anyone doing similar work.

Today I am mainly waiting around. Uncharacteristically, I have packed almost everything and so just have my iPod and the laptop for company whilst I await my dads arrival. I'm hoping we'll head out for a steak later so I'm passing the time by warming my stomach up.

It's been an adventure down here in Cornwall. I can't claim to have enjoyed every minute of it, but I think overall I'm glad I came down here to do the work, and I hope it will have use and significance to anyone wishing to continue what I have started.

Tuesday 3 August 2010

Life Is A Roller Coaster, Wise Words Ronan...

Today was full of ups and downs. I managed to bag a lift over to the east coast to continue where I'd left off several weeks earlier. On my walk down to my starting point in the drizzle, a dense Cornish mist descended on the cliff tops and surrounded me, making me feel like the only man in the world. At the same time I was listening to some fairly bad eighties albums in order to give them a star rating, after a bright idea last night to come up with a top five album list from every year since I was born. Together, these two things made me feel very sorry for myself, and I spent the majority of the morning angrily moping around, watching the clock. The rain got worse and my work became harder, until eventually I gave up and decided to indulge in one of my favourite daily pursuits: scrambling over rocks. I decided I'd give up on the music and instead re-listen to some old Adam and Joe podcasts, and just as I was slipping around amongst the rocks the sun came out and the day improved no end. After a good half and hour of what can only be described as "dicking about", I continued with my work, resembling a damp, sweaty maniac as I walked around laughing heartily to myself.

I got to my final destination earlier than expected, so partook in another of my hobbies here and followed a random footpath to see where it would go. Nowhere particularly interesting it turned out, although I did see a woman and her daughter blatantly collecting poppy seeds which I thought was a bit suspicious. It got to about half three and I headed up to where I knew the volunteers were working today to get a lift back to base. As I approached I saw one of Natural England's tractors leaving site, so I assumed I was just in time. I was not. I walked around the entire site, and realising no one was there rang headquarters. I was helpfully informed everyone was back at base except Steve, who might be able to pick me up if he was still around. I rang Steve, but his phone was off. Perfect. Seven miles from the caravan the anger began to rise again and I set off along the main road for the long journey back. After about two miles Steve rack however, and was good enough to come out and pick me up, which was much appreciated. Things were looking up again, and when I got I had an email waiting for me informing me I'd be receiving a pay cheque for my time here. Hurrah!

To confirm, a day of ups and downs. One of my more boring posts I'm afraid, but what do you expect, I'm almost done!

Monday 2 August 2010

Nervous on Night Drives

Before I start, just a few of my favourite signs from the last few days:
Today the weather was glorious so I headed out and about to try and get as much done before my return back to Birmingham at the end of the week. Unfortunately, the weather brings out my least favourite breed of people: the tourists. Just look at this beach, this really is a hell on Earth to me:
There's probably a hint of jealousy in my vitriol as these people can lounge around all day frolicking in the sun, whereas I am still unenthusiastically counting carrots every few steps. Not for much longer though! This almost wasn't the case however, as I had a phone call from my lecturer today trying to convince me to stay here for an additional week so I could meet up with a Natural England employee who has done previous work similar to my project. What annoyed me is that he dropped this bombshell on me three days before I'm due to leave and expects me to dotingly go along with it. No dice. I basically explained that my dad has had to rearrange his whole week in order to come and collect me, and I am quite literally down to my last scraps of cash. If he'd offered me some funding, or even informed me of this a few weeks ago I could have made arrangements and possibly would have stayed for an additional week. I was seconds away from telling him I needed to come home for my own sanity more than anything else, but bit my tongue and kept it professional. We both stood our ground amicably and so I am still due home this week, much to his disgust. There's just been too many last minute decisions already on this course, and with the end in sight I think one more may have been the straw that broke the camels back. I think had I agreed, a scene similar to the ending of "Falling Down" may have ensued...

Saturday 31 July 2010

Message To Ray: Go Home Ray

I found out the other day that when heated, plastic bottles release a female hormone into the water contained within. I've been using the same plastic bottle for eight weeks now, and still no breasts...

So not a lot has been happening, I've just been tying up loose ends with my project. Therefore I thought I'd treat you to an insight into my caravan life by showing you the rigmarole I go through each night to go to bed.

Firstly, here's the general start point:
Next, I have to tidy up the general mess. It's important to keep organised in a small space:
Hmm, I seem to have just put the laptop away... Then I have to slide the table in between the "sofas" to create the base for the bed:
Now, this next bit is the hardest, and has resulted in me destroying the majority of the upholstery on the caravan walls. I have to move the mattresses so they are lying across the table, but there's not enough room to take them off and put them back on, so I just have drag them under each other and kick them into place:
That's one done, and now for the second (slightly trickier):
All that's left to do is fashion a pillow out of the duvet and climb into the sleeping bag:
Tada! As long as there's no flies or moths left in the caravan, I can curl up in relative luxury.

This is my last weekend here so I'm trying to decide what to do with myself. I could do with giving my legs a day off, although I'm sure when I'm back in Birmingham I'll slip back into a sedentary lifestyle so I should probably get out on the coast whilst I still can.

Wednesday 28 July 2010

I Can't Think Of A Cryptic Or Clever Title

Just a very brief update as I haven't got a lot to report I'm afraid.

Yesterday I surveyed the last area I needed to in order to have a continuous stretch of the coast mapped, so anything else I do now is just a bonus really. I seem to have gotten into the habit of wandering off along footpaths to "see where they go", which isn't always ideal when you have things to do and are scared of cows.

Today I headed north of Mullion which made a nice change from simply going to Mullion. The sun broke through after a very threatening looking morning though, so I headed back as I'd forgotten my suncream, and I'm incredibly lazy. I took a random footpath to spice my journey back up a bit and after an hour genuinely ended up back where I started. It was like a bad comedy. When I got back I took in some of the air show going on a couple of miles away, but after the fourth loop-the-loop and almost blinding myself I retired to the comfort of the caravan and got up to date with my work.

I'm growing sick of these "
bitey" flies. I swatted one away today when I felt it bite my arm, and then I saw a load of what looked like maggots all over my arm. I'm pretty fearful it was trying to lay something inside me but I think I nipped it in the bud before the fly could get too into it. Needless to say I had a long, cold shower on my return, and am now maggot free (externally at least). Maybe the fly was exacting revenge for my graveyard of fly death which I call a window.

Crap, it's started raining, I've gotta go.

Monday 26 July 2010

Judecca

I don't mean to complain (although I frequently do), but if anything it's too hot down here at the minute. This has brought the tourists out of hibernation in droves, meaning the once quiet cliff tops are now littered with overweight men wearing only their Speedo's. I also had to queue to get onto the beach at Kynance Cove today, which annoyed me so much I went home...

This weekend my folks were down in Cornwall for a weekend break, and were kind enough to get me a room at the Bed and Breakfast they were staying at. This place was an absolute luxury, possibly too good for little old me but I'm not complaining, look at my room!
Saturday was overcast so we headed over to the Eden Project which was fantastic, the biomes
they've created are incredible and the whole place keeps pushing the importance of biodiversity in an interactive and accessible way. It was also a photographer's dream, I took over a hundred pictures, but I'll share only this one with you which I was particularly pleased with:
The mist descended as the day progressed and we ended up watching a band over in Porthleven
which was rather a pleasant place:
Sunday was glorious so we drove to Cadgwith and picked up the coastal path to see the sights now they were visible. It was also my dad's birthday, so happy birthday again!

They left this morning, after a trip to Tesco for food and beer, and now I'm back into the swing of works for the last stretch, less than two weeks and I'll be back!

Thursday 22 July 2010

Cow News, Just In...

How frustrating, I just set out for the day and half way into my journey a heavy rain set in and soaked me to the bone. Sulking, I headed back and low and behold, by the time I was back at the workshop it was brilliant sunshine. I'll try again this afternoon.

Yesterday I went down to
Kynance Cliffs and filled in my penultimate gap in the coastline. One more day's work and I finally have a continuous stretch of the coast that I've surveyed and the rest of my time can be spent heading as far north as time will permit. However, what you really want is the cow news, I can just tell.

You may remember from an earlier post a sign warning walkers about the dangers of grazing cattle. Well, today I was surveying their home. At first I couldn't see them, and assumed they were far back in the fields. Then I saw them, a 60 strong herd of black, angry beasts nonchalantly occupying the cliff edge.
My first reaction was to head onto the rocks and scramble my way past them in an area I knew would be
inaccessible to them. Of course, this is ridiculous and I probably put myself in more danger rock climbing, although I did happen across several of the species I'm looking for. So I headed back up to the top, and emerged about 10 metres away from the wretched beasts. I froze, but then spied a couple having a lunchtime stroll, so I decided to tag along. I figured if they get brutally attacked, at least I'd be able to make a dash for it... I followed a few paces behind them, being sure never to get in the way of a mother and her calf (the cows I'm talking about now, not the couple). I managed to get through the herd unscathed, and although visibly shaking, I was pleased with myself. On the walk back I braved them alone, which I instantly regretted as soon as I encountered the first cow. They were now spread across the entire field, meaning I had to be "amongst them" for a good 10 minutes. They all have horns as well. Needless to say I survived, and feel I've overcome my bovinophobia to a certain degree. However, on the way back a horse threw itself at a gate designed to keep it enclosed as I passed by, so I might just start being scared of them again...

Incidentally this rock outcrop is called The Horse, and I'm still yet to figure out why.

Tuesday 20 July 2010

A Dream Within A Dream

I'm back in the caravan once again after a fantastic weekend back in Birmingham. I hopped on an earlier train in the end on Thursday which meant I was back Birmingham town at about 6:00pm, three hours earlier than planned which meant I was able to enjoy a much more relaxed evening with Sam and "the house".

Friday night saw us head over to the Electric Cinema to watch Inception on opening night. Thankfully I didn't pull my usual opening night trick and go to a midnight showing, although the red wine certainly made me sleepy. This was unrelated to the film though, which was excellent, possibly the best I've seen this year. It had the full package really, an engaging and slightly confusing story, phenomenal special effects, just the right amount of violence, and superb performances from Leonardo DiCaprio (fast becoming my favourite actor) and Joseph Gordon-Levitt. It's the sort of film you think about for weeks after, and in fact I've just been engaged in a text exchange with Mike about possible plot holes, which left us both baffled. I won't say too much though as I went in knowing nothing about the film and enjoyed it all the more for it.

Saturday night was Mike's birthday party, which almost didn't happen due to indecisive weather and a general air of confusion surrounding the proceedings. However, all went according to plan in the end, and the night was a triumph of arm wrestling and slam
dancing. I would put pictures up but they're all of people, and you know my feelings about that. By that, I don't mean people, that makes me sound like a sociopath.

Sunday was a joyfully lazy day, with Steve cooking us up a huge hangover fry-up followed by a brief jaunt to the outside world to see some old friends (namely Nicholas and Hanzibar). The general laziness was sky high for Sam and I, but much needed simply to forget about our projects for a day.

And now once again I'm back in the caravan for my final stint. Today it is the wettest I've known it so far down here, and my lift cancelled so it's another day indoors drinking tea and trying to crack on with work.

In bovinophobia news, I returned yesterday to find eight Highland cattle have moved into the field that is about 10 metres away from the caravan. There's a gate separating us, obviously, but these cows are calving. I was actually told "they're alright, but just after they give birth is when you need to be careful; that's when they're really dangerous". They should all be dropping their payloads in the next few days so we'll see if that's when they break out and kill me in my sleep...

Wednesday 14 July 2010

The Trial

I was out on the hunt for wild asparagus again yesterday, but we were visiting much more accessible populations so no adventures to report I'm afraid. I did see a snake though, and when I attempted to take a picture of it it shot off into the grass. I was later informed that this was an adder, which, although not deadly, if I was bitten by one I would require anti-venom. I should probably be more careful when manipulating the local fauna.

Today I have holed myself up in the caravan to partake in some computer based work. My actual project is getting increasingly harder in the field as the flowering season is ending, or has in fact ended, for many of the species I'm surveying. I'm also starting to fear for my mental health as these long nights and weekends alone have seen me talking to all manner of inanimate objects, although I have manged to re-watch a lot of films which I had trouble recollecting from the first time I'd seen them. But tomorrow I'm back in Birmingham for the weekend, and I can't wait. What a rare treat it will be to be around people! Apart from the obvious, here are the things I am looking forward to most:
1. Using a flushing toilet.
2. Having a hot shower in a space that allows me to move my arms.
3. Sleeping in a double bed which I don't have to construct before I sleep on it.
4. Using more than one saucepan.
5. Simply turning on a tap when I want water, as opposed to having to run outside, whatever the weather, and then inevitably have to run outside again when the hose attachment falls out, whilst simultaneously listening to see if yet another pipe has exploded dramatically.
6. Dry carpets.
7. More than one room.
8. Having an unlimited drinking water supply that doesn't come from a 5 litre bottle.
9. Not seeing any wild carrots anywhere.
10. In fact, not doing any work. As there's little else to do here, I'm frequently immersed in work to pass the time, so a few days off will be welcomed.
11. All my music at my fingertips, as opposed to on a temperamental iPod, through real speakers.
12. Being able to walk less than a mile when I want a pint of milk or some Polos.
13. Not smelling. On a side note here, I walked into the office the other morning, and Claire just looked at me with pity, sighed, and said "Look at you". My dishevelled look has scored me a home cooked meal at her gaff tonight though, but hasn't entirely stopped me from feeling quite pathetic.
14. Being able to wash my clothes! I have attempted sink washing underwear, but the humiliation of hanging all of my smalls outside the caravan for all to see often outweighs the benefits of having fresh undergarments.

I won't go into the people I'm looking forward to seeing the most as that's far too sentimental and slushy for the public domain. Just 24 more hours to get through and then I'll be on the train home, hurrah! Can you tell I'm, quite looking forward to it?

Monday 12 July 2010

We Are The Robots (Plink Plonky Plink)

I bounded into the workshop this morning, unsure of what my plan for the day was, to find the place deserted. After further investigation I found one person had bothered to show up: Steve. Steve is probably my favourite member of staff here, he is so full of energy that he cycles the fourteen miles to work every day just so he can face a few hours in front of a computer. It puts my lack of enthusiasm on the two-wheeler to shame. Anyway, he informed me that most people had cleverly wangled the day off, much to my utter disgust. I decided to hang around the workshop for an hour as I'd arranged to meet a National Trust warden last week but couldn't remember which day she'd said, so thought it best that I was at least around in case she did turn up. She didn't. It got to 10am so I told Steve I was going to head out. "If you wait ten minutes I'll give you a lift" he generously chirped, and as it was raining I couldn't refuse. After ten minutes he grabbed the keys and said "You've got a driving license right?", which I confirmed. "You can drive then!" This to me was great news. I haven't driven in months, and the only vehicles here are Land Rovers. My first task was to reverse it out of the garage, and I was helpfully reminded to avoid the walls, which I did, and proceeded to precariously creep along the winding country roads that litter the landscape here. It was nice to be driving again, especially in such a dominating beast of a machine, I felt like I owned the road. All too quickly we arrived at my destination and Steve took his "wheels" back, shame.

As usual, after about two hours of surveying I became fairly distracted, and spied this curiosity in the distance, which I felt was my duty to pursue.
As I got closer I realised it belonged to the local RAF base, and so wouldn't be able to sit in it and pretend to fend of the "Gerries", as I'd assumed I'd be able to. I did, however, find myself in a field of cows. Now, my bovinophobia appears to be spiralling out of control, which isn't particularly useful when they're bloody everywhere.
I don't mind him actually, he has good hair. Or is that a female? If it's a cow I assume the latter. Incidentally this picture was snapped from the other side of an electric fence. I was over there for sampling purposes, not to avoid the cow before you laugh too hard. Anyway, I spent a lot of the rest of the day avoiding other cows and trying to dodge this cloud:
I thought I was being fairly pathetic and was about to embrace a field of cows when I saw this helpful sign:
So my fear doesn't seem quite so irrational now, but it is still something I'll have to face eventually. They're just so big and seemingly aggressive in this neck of the woods! I couldn't get phone reception to ring for a lift back so ended up walking it and getting absolutely soaked. I did manage to finally take a picture of this
monstrosity though:
This is the "sculpture" they put outside the local art gallery to tell the public they are open, and is the sole reason I haven't ventured in yet. I've spent the evening constantly eating to replenish the numerous reserves I must have used up on my mammoth trek back.

Sunday 11 July 2010

Wind Moves The Can

Hurrah! I've been searching for a Broken Social Scene track all day and literally just found it (Bandwitch since you ask).

I managed to get out and about today over to Mullion (makes a nice change) to finish a bit of work I was unable to last week due to battery issues. I also ran out of bottled water today and so went against all the advice given to me by the staff here and tried the tap water. Just popped a couple of Imodium's straight after, lovely stuff.

I once again got slightly preoccupied with taking pictures of nature and that, so here's a few snaps, one of which is a toad, amazing!
I found my old LiveJournal account last night and my angsty scribblings have been keeping me amused today, I definitely needed a kick up the arse at the age of about 20. Fun times though. I've been reading an article about Stanley Kubrick on and off today. A book has just been published detailing a film about Napolean that he never made. It's in 10 volumes, weighs 10kg and costs £900. Surely there can't be that much to be written about an unmade movie?

This is getting a bit scattershot, so I will leave now and settle down to a movie, perhaps another Hitchcock to continue my "Hitchcock in the Caravan" season.

Saturday 10 July 2010

No Point Mentioning Those Bats...

Not a lot to report today, so after watching Gonzo, I'll leave you with a few of my favourite Hunter S. Thompson quotes.

"The edge, there is no honest way to explain it because the only people who really know where it is are the ones who have gone over."

"He who makes a beast out of himself gets rid of the pain of being a man."

"
America...just a nation of two hundred million used car salesmen with all the money we need to buy guns and no qualms about killing anybody else in the world who tries to make us uncomfortable."

"I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me.
"

Friday 9 July 2010

Interior Decorating

I was in the middle of a film yesterday evening (The 39 Steps if you're asking) and ventured out of the caravan mid-way to turn the water on. I noticed someone was still here, and as this was about 7:00pm I thought this unusual so went investigate. It was in fact Ray, my supervisor here, who proceeded to tell me his life story whilst sorting the entire office out. About 45 minutes later, I felt we'd bonded and as I left he promised me that tomorrow I could interview him about site management, as had been promised for many weeks. Great stuff.

So today I awoke and was happy in the knowledge that today I wouldn't have to brave the outside world as it was raining and generally just a miserable day. I entered the office a little after 9:00am, and entered Ray's office:
Me: Morning Ray! Are we still okay to talk about management today?
Ray: Yeah no problem, I just have some finance stuff to get out of the way and then we'll do it. Shall we say 11?
Me: Sounds good, I'll get on with some paperwork.
Ray: Hmmm, have I got a teleconference at 11? No, that must be at 10, although...[trails off].
Great stuff, I could get on with my write up and properly wake up with a few more cups of tea and some music.

Anyway, 11:00am rolls around and I entered the office to find it completely deserted. I searched the workshop, the garage, but couldn't locate anyone. Then I heard voices and saw that yes, the teleconference was in fact at 11:00am. No problem, I thought, I'll merely give it 20 minutes and come back in. 20 minutes later...still teleconferencing. 20 minutes later than that...still teleconferencing. I was left twiddling my thumbs a bit...
A lost art.

In the end I had my lunch and went back in at about 12:20pm to find Ray sprawled out on the floor slicing up carpet:

Ray: Oh hi Joe, I've been meaning to do this for ages!
Me: ...What are you doing?
Ray: I'm just creating a bit of protective carpet for around the wood chip burner.
Me: Oh...cool. Nice job.
Ray: I thought so, when I retire here I think I'll take up carpet fitting.
Me: [Thinks] Lovely stuff.
Ray: Don't let me forget to throw away the excess...unless you want it for the caravan?
Me: Actually I will take it, it'll cover up all the damp spots.
Ray: [Laughs]
Me: [Laughs begrudgingly, takes new rug]
Nice huh?

Me: So...can we do that interview now?

Ray: Sure, I've just got to pop into Mullion for 10 minutes to get the papers, you can come along if you like?
Me: Actually I will do, I need some milk anyway.
So off we went into Mullion to quickly drop off some Natural England leaflets at the cove and pop to the shop.

Two hours later we got back to the workshop, after speaking to the majority of the village, standing on the cliff tops and, eventually, buying milk. We're sitting in the car...
Me: Thanks for that, I'll just put this in the fridge.
Ray: Okay, I'll be in shortly, I'm just going to sit in here and read the paper.
Fair enough, I thought. Technically he hasn't had a lunch break.

I sat in the office chatting with the other staff and Ray waltzed in about 20 minutes later and proceeded to log into his computer with such painstaking care that it took a good 10 minutes. He was then informed that someone had rang for him, so naturally he called them back. This turned into a 30 minute phone call so I went and sat outside. When I got back in he was still on the phone, so I just sat next to him and stared. Eventually he finished bantering with whoever he was speaking to, and then, after this long wait, we were finally ready to go! We made it about five steps out of the office when Ray said "Do you want a drink? I could do with a tea." Me bloody too. So, as always seems to happen to me in these situations, I made the tea and then we sat down in the meeting room for the all important management talk. Well, it lasted about 10 minutes and resulted in this much information:
Yep, that's all.

It took me about 30 minutes to write up, and that's because the computer crashed. To conclude, today was an annoying day, but a great lesson in the art of procrastinating.

Wednesday 7 July 2010

Indiana Joe and the Recorders of the Lost Asparagus

I awoke today wanting to do anything but go out into the field. I think the post holiday blues had set in, plus it was raining outside and I'd left my walking boots out in the rain resulting in me being forced to wear a pair of wellies at least two sizes too big. However, I knew I'd have to brave the rain as I'd arranged to go out and about with a National Trust warden in search of wild asparagus. So I pulled my boots up (literally), and we set off just after 9:00am.

We arrived at the first site and headed to the coast. The first thing Rachel said was "Are you up for scrambling over some rocks?". Sure, why not. Well, lucky I didn't back out, as it turned out to be the best day in the field yet! We started by
very carefully hopping over an electric fence into a fairly unexplored region of the coastline, armed only with our wits and coordinates that should take us to this very rare plant. Within about ten minutes and with a small amount of downward climbing done, we located a known population of wild asparagus. After that we decided we wanted to find an undiscovered population, so split up and headed along the very rocky coastline. We took it in turns to either take the high road (fairly easy grassland), or the low road (surprisingly dangerous cliffs and sheer drops). This took me right back to my youth when me and my brother would spend summer days climbing rocks at Beacon Hill, often pretending we were in Jurassic Park, but that's another story. Eventually we struck gold and found a lone plant which hadn't been discovered before. Success!

After a brief lunch break we headed to a second site. I was still buzzing from the morning's climbing, but this site was more than I could have hoped for. In order to access any wild asparagus here, we had to climb the unclimbable. On several
occasions I was thinking to myself "Is this worth it?!", but as this was the most excitement I'd had out in the field, I decided that yes, it was. Particular dangerous highlights included attempting to cross a small valley with a sheer drop below and no footing. I had to put all of my faith into the plants and simply grip them and hope for the best. I also kept choosing particularly awkward routes back up to the top, ideally ones that involved more climbing and less walking. I had quite literally a cliffhanger moment at one point where I was pulling myself up with a rock crack and the rock I'd grabbed broke off. If I hadn't had decent footing I'd have been a goner. All very exhilarating stuff, and I think when I return to Birmingham and have some money I'd like to take up rock climbing as a hobby. Unfortunately the pictures I took don't do the sheer drops and tricky climbs justice, they just look like nice coastline, so you'll have to take my word for it, but here's a couple of slopes I conquered anyway:
We're heading out again next week for more death defying acts, all in the name of conservation.

Tuesday 6 July 2010

Sign of the Times

Today I was back to work in the field after a long weekend camping just outside of Falmouth. It was a fantastic holiday, and I shall share with you now a few highlights.

Firstly, I hadn't seen the tent before we pitched as Sam brought it down with her:
At first I was slightly apprehensive as it is somewhat feminine. However, as Sam repeatedly reminded me, I do currently spend my days picking flowers so I can't really criticise. I grew to love that tent though, it was surprisingly spacious for a two-manner and kept off the weather (which in fairness was pretty good). It didn't, however, block out the noise of the man next door who insisted on discussing the wind direction with his lift at 7:00am every morning. I let this slide though as you do tend to wake up with the sun when camping, which is no bad thing.

We managed to squeeze a lot into the weekend which was good because I think we both needed the break away from our projects. So, we hit the beach in Falmouth, and actually braved the sea despite it being the coldest water I've ever been in (I genuinely couldn't feel my own body afterwards). I won't disturb anyone with pictures of me in the sea, nor embarrass Sam with pictures of her. I thought I'd be acclimatised to coldness, what with not having hot water and all, but alas no. Remarkably I had more facilities camping than I do in the caravan. After the beach we had a sweet sweet barbecue back at the campsite, which, despite setting the grass on fire on several occasions, was a success.
We also partook in several country rambles, the most eventful of which ended with us having to hotfoot it over some barbed wire when a field full of cows kept charging every time we tried to get past. It was genuinely as if they were trying to block our exit, but we'd come too far to turn back. Needless to say we survived and rewarded ourselves with some well earned pub grub, after a trip to a very trendy little cafe with many board games on offer.
Ho ho. The evening meal was actually courtesy of my Grandma who sent me some money so we could have a nice meal out. I took this to the extreme and had a massive steak and a dessert, as you do.

We also stumbled across several odd and amusing signs on our travels, the Cornish seem to be excellent at ridiculous and stupid signs, so here's small selection.
All in all it was a great weekend, and nice to be away from the caravan. I am back now though, obviously, but am stocked to the rafters with canned goods after a tactical trip to Tesco's on the journey back, made all the more entertaining by the taxi driver exclusively discussing his last crash. Dear me.

By the way, you may notice a distinct lack of pictures of me or Sam on here, but I feel odd putting pictures of people on here, plus Sam's blog is actually read by professionals, so if they ended up here for some reason it might be weird to see soppy pictures of a possible employee. Just so you know.

That's all for now, byeeeeee!

Thursday 1 July 2010

Wash Out

No pictures today I'm afraid folks, due to the rain most of today has been spent cooped up in my caravan. I started out in the field with the volunteer who carts me around of a Thursday, but I think even she was finding the work tedious, once again I was stopping every few minutes to take a reading. When the first drop of rain hit her head she called it a day, much to my delight. Neither of us wanted to get drenched, and trying to write information on a recording form in the rain is neither easy nor pleasurable. This gave me an opportunity to get up to date with my work, as well as crack on with my write up. So for once at the end of the working day, 5:00pm, I'm actually finished and have a sweet four days off now. The rain does mean I can't take my usual jaunt over to Mullion for biscuits, but I'm sure I'll survive this once. The weather's meant to improve tomorrow, but even if it doesn't the prospect of a few days away from the caravan (with rather good company) is certainly an exciting one. I've even blagged a lift to the bus stop tomorrow so I'm cruising down Easy Street.

Now, what to do with the evening?

Wednesday 30 June 2010

Blister in the Sun

Ho ho, I'd like to meet the genius who created this classic edit.

Another long day today. Not to be a
curmudgeoning old man or anything, but despite the spectacular scenery...
...the work is starting to get slightly monotonous. I seem to only be able to walk a few metres before I have to stop, unpack all my
equipment and battle with my recording sheets in the wind. I think it would just be more enjoyable, and in fact easier, if I had someone to help me. Unfortunately the guy who was supposed to be coming down in July to assist has had to cancel, unsurprisingly due to a lack of funding. I'll stop moaning though.

I had done everything I could by 3:30pm today, and rang my lift to see how they were getting on. They informed me that they'd be a good hour yet, and as I'm not the best at just hanging around, I decided
I'd attempt the 5 mile journey back on foot. It was actually very enjoyable (and I never turn down an excuse to try and build up my chicken legs), although when I was about a mile away one of the staff drove passed and offered me a lift, and it would have been rude to refuse. I was making good time though, I'd only been walking for an hour. There are no pavements on the roads here though so the walk did have its hairy moments, mostly involving stubborn lorry drivers. It did give me a chance to get reacquainted with Why?, specifically their album Elephant Eyelash, which is fast becoming my favourite release of theirs. If you've never heard them you're really missing out.

There were loads of artists out today which was nice to see:
This was a slightly awkward picture to take, as the woman on the left is painting in her bra, so it basically looked like I was just taking a picture of her. I wasn't, for the record.

I better get back to the books, I'm a day behind on writing up my field work, but it's taking me hours. I'm desperate to get it all out of the way by the weekend though for a well earned few days off in
Falmouth, happy days!

Tuesday 29 June 2010

Box of Rain

First off, apologies for the lack of updates over the last couple of days. I've received all of your angry letters and attempted to respond to as many as possible, but I'm only one man with one pen. The truth of the matter is I've been suffering from quite severe headaches, which is quite a new experience for me. I think it has something to do with the intense humidity, and from constant temperature changes thanks to only having cold water. I'm sure staring at a computer screen can't help much either. Anyway, I'm all better now, and some how soldiered on, I really deserve some sort of gold plated medal (preferably one where once I remove the gold plating, there's some sweet sweet chocolate inside).

I had my first unexpected visitors the other night in the form of the local youth. They were after firewood from the enormous pile of wood that resides behind my caravan. I flat out refused, and realised afterwards this was possibly a bad idea as I have no lock on the caravan. They've not returned though and I have gained the occassional nickname of Nightwatchman
amongst the staff, much to my delight. I think it also highlighted the fact that it's not the safest situation they've put me in here, although in fairness Cornwall has the lowest crime rate in Britain (I think), but on exiting the building yesterday Ray shouted "be safe!", which was followed by several cries of "yes, be safe!". No offers of a house yet though.

Today I've been out and about on the east side of the Lizard peninsula, and managed to bag a lift there and back which is always a bonus. Below is the Devil's Frying Pan, which I looked out over whilst stuffing my face with sandwiches. The place names around here do make me laugh, they're trying so hard to be cool and different, but often are not successful. Impressive though.
I also tried my first batch of Cornish fudge today. My word, it was an explosion all over my unprepared tastebuds. I will try to bring a stack home for everyone if I have any money left, it really is incredible stuff.

Whilst wandering today I decided to just listen to bands beginning with "M", after being heavily influenced by Sam's word association game in iTunes, although I won't steal her thunder and describe that here! This made me want to listen to all of the albums on my iPod and attempt to rate them all. However, the first band on my iPod is A. I put their album on, enjoyed "Foghorn", and then realised how awful they were, and realised there was no way I could sit through two full length albums by them and so gave up almost instantly. My brother warned me this would happen but I thought I was made of stronger stuff than that. It did prompt me to listen to ABC though, and that was bloody great!

I'll leave you with a picture of Foxglove, a flower I'm quite obsessed with photographing, and in fact it still makes me laugh when I think about foxes actually using the flowers as gloves. Simple things.

Sunday 27 June 2010

4-1, It's Lucky I Don't Really Care

I awoke this morning to the sound of someone messing around with my water supply. I assumed it was Ray, my supervisor here, so got up so as not to appear lazy. When I opened the door though, he was nowhere to be seen. This either means cabin fever's setting in or some passer by was curious as to why someone would live in such a fly infested caravan.

Today was seconds away from being a write off; I woke up feeling awful and didn't know whether it was just hayfever or the onset of a cold. Thankfully I took a tablet, manned up, and headed to my favourite walking destination, Mullion. I decided I'd do work today though as I'm going to be taking next Friday and Monday off for a long weekend in Falmouth with Sam, and didn't want to be referred to as "that work-shy gypsy". In fairness they're all so laid back here they probably won't even notice I'm gone, but I am a pretty paranoid individual (see paragraph one). I got some good field work done, but won't bore you with too many of the details. Instead, here's some pictures.
These are horses. Yep, that degree money wasn't wasted mum and dad. I took this though because the brown horse (can I call him that?) is actually blindfolded. I searched for a while but couldn't find any eye holes, so I was hoping someone might be able to shed some light (no pun intended) on why this would be of any benefit to anyone?

Below is a Sea Carrot, one of the species I'm surveying, and for some reason have become mildly obsessed with:
And here are my current neighbours, who I am trying to teach musical culture to. In fact I must get a recording of them one day to put on here because they all sound like someone doing a bad impression of a sheep, as opposed to an actual sheep. Don't tell them that though...
And last but not least, the leak came back today, but not in such a severe manner, so here's the piping I had to tighten up yet again whilst risking my life bent over an electrical device:
Over and out.